Late Night Pondering

I won’t lie, I too lay awake at night wondering about the imminent tomorrow. Am I going in the right direction? Is all this worth it?

All questions that invade my mind at night, perhaps that’s the reason I sit here, or perhaps it’s the nagging feeling in my skin that I must finish what I started by filling up the backlog of missed days on this blog.

Whatever the reason may be, I sit here, in the early hours of the morning, pondering.

Do you ever feel like all your doing is for naught? I do sometimes, and whilst lately I’ve been knocking down obstacles left and right, it feels like there’s something missing, and perhaps it’s the simple fact that I’m not taking time off to reflect on the amazing things I’ve been accomplishing.

Like, recently I was able to close one of the most profitable sales of my career up to now, and yet for some reason I still don’t feel like I’ve achieved all I’ve wanted.

What does one want, when one has all one wishes?

And then it strikes me, like a lighting bolt waiting to re-spark a lost neural connection for centuries.

One does not want money, fame, or power. What one truly wishes for is a bit more complex than a magical cure for this emptiness inside us.

What we want is the wisdom to enjoy it all, enjoy the good, enjoy the bad, and the in between must of all. Because a sword is not born sharp, it must be grinded day in and day out, all in hopes that one day it will all focus enough for it to pierce even the thickest of barriers.

Isn’t that what life is? The grinding of the soul,  the piercing of the veil that mundane reality may hold against us?

With that I send this into the ether, in hopes that it makes you wonder, are you sharp enough, if not are you working on sharpening those edges?

I feel a bit freer after this, thank you for reading.

Thank you

~Antonio

 

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